One step forward, one step back

I want to update everyone on how things are going, but at the same time I’m oddly afraid to. As if making a statement of our current status will tempt fate to change things for the worse. But that kind of thinking is why I take Lexapro, so screw it:

Long story short: Dad’s back in the hospital. He had another stroke. That’s AFTER the one he had late January of this year. Another clot in the same Y branch of his brain, this time on the right side of the branch. Docs have ruled out a problem in his heart or his carotid. Clots are just forming in the brain, which we’ll combat with blood thinners, and cholesterol medicine to keep things open and flowing. Since this latest stroke is in the same spot, his symptoms aren’t as intense, but it feels like we’re starting over at step one. Literally. Dad’s left foot is non-responsive and we’re going back into in-patient rehab to wake it up and get him walking again. If the new blood thinners do their job, and I pray they will, then once he’s done with in-patient I can get him on a plane and finally go home.

Dad's the one who's ailing, yet everyone is worried about ME. I’m holding up pretty good, I guess. I’m a mess some nights. I’m frustrated and worried. I feel guilty on days I stay home to work and don’t visit him. I feel guilty on days I visit him and don’t get any work done. 

So, look...I know this sounds bleak, but despite everything, we’re okay. Dad’s here. Still 100% Frank. And that fact that Papa's attitude is so good, and that he's eager to do therapy and move to Seattle is a HUGE blessing. It sucks being here handling this by myself, but Papa and I make a good team. We’ll take it one day at a time and tackle each challenge as it comes.

Thank you for bearing with me as I struggle to maintain a posting schedule through all this. Making comics is the one thing that helps calm and center me. Thank you for giving me this life and supporting my work. It’s made it possible for me to be here to take care of my dad when he needs me. I’ll never be able to repay all of you for that.

Thank you, Thank you. Hug your loved ones. Put off nothing. Create. Be present. Be grateful.